A few days ago, at the NBA All-Stars game, Fergie (American singer, songwriter and actress, and best known for her time in the Black Eyed Peas) sang her rendition of the U.S. National Anthem.
She wandered artistically through the lyrics. Proudly showed off the extent of her singing range with vocal gymnastics… and oozed her sensuality all over the basketball court!
Finally, Fergie finished her performance, and triumphantly told the teams “Let’s play some basketball!”
But alas, her unique twist on the age-old anthem didn’t go down too well.
Social media lit up like a Christmas Tree and the Main Stream Media had their say. According to all sources… it was a “Train-Wreck!” The kind that once you start to watch, it’s impossible to stop.
But to be fair Fergie isn’t the only person who has ever done this.
Many singers use vocal gymnastics. Many times, where a simple note would suffice, they channel their inner Whitney Houston and over sing the crap out of it!
By why do they do it?
It’s simple… they want to sound more talented than they “actually” are.
The truth is, the kinds of singers who can use this type of vocal technique without it sounding forced, are few and far between.
But those who can, are amazing.
Their vocals are so smooth that you’re taken on a musical journey and are blissfully unaware of how they are singing… and only aware they are singing.
When people write, the same thing happens.
There are writers (not just copywriters) who can take you on a journey with their words to realms and realities you could never dream of.
The transition from your current reality is smooth and seamless.
But it’s not always that way. Occasionally you see a writer “Do a Fergie” and they just try way too hard.
The fact is when it comes to copywriting and communicating…
Knowledge Nugget #131: Let Your Words Do The Work… And Don’t Try So Hard!
When people write, they try too hard to make their writing powerful.
The main way they do that is buy using adverbs (modifiers) and adjectives (describers.) But they are usually trying to strengthen weak words.
You’ll be able to recognize adverbs easily because they are the words that commonly end in –ly. E.g. badly, loudly, incredibly.
While adjectives are the words like very, many, and actual.
They are also words that are redundant e.g. blue sky, large elephant, and green grass. The problem with these words (in bold) is it’s expected, which make them redundant.
A friend recently told me that adverbs and adjectives are like a guy with a pair of socks in the pants… it’s all show and no go! (It was a male friend by the way.) Now when I read my copy… I’m looking for a pair of socks.
So how can you make your writing stronger without using linguistic gymnastics?
Here are a few tips:
- Say what you have to say. Be concise, precise… and don’t waffle.
- Use short sentences. Full Stops / Periods are your friend.
- Use strong action verbs that can carry the whole piece of writing.
- And always remember “we read with our ears.” Make your writing easy to hear.
The point is, when you have a strong writing style, you don’t need to use anything to try to make it better. There’s no need to use linguistic gymnastics. They just make it look like you’re trying too hard.
Just like singers. The only singers who need to over sing lyrics are the singers who try to amplify their restricted range.
When they use vocal gymnastics, the lyrics are lost, and the singing becomes all about them. And the audience switches off.
Whereas, singers who have the range, use the technique sparingly and accentuate the song. The song is never about them, and they keep the attention of the audience. It’s a beautiful thing!
So how do you know if you’re using linguistic gymnastics?
You can use a writing app or software but be aware that these are programmed to be grammatically correct, which helps… but it will neuter your writing. It takes the conversational copy and makes it talk like a stuffy, over-educated academic.
Or you can get someone you trust to read your writing for you.
Or you can get a professional critique from someone who writes for a living.
When I first started writing, I had my writing critiqued at every opportunity (and I still do.) Of course, it’s daunting. It can be intimidating to have some person, leap years better than you, look at your writing. But remember, they aren’t judging you. (Or at least they shouldn’t be!)
They are looking at the structure of your writing, and the strategy behind it.
Anyone who cannot give you constructive feedback, even if your writing isn’t up to par, isn’t anyone worth listening to. (And if they swear at you and tell you how useless you are… run, don’t walk away from them! It’s not helpful and it says more about their ineffective teaching style… not your writing style.)
In all the critiques Parris has given me, he has never insulted my intelligence or me personally. But he has “gone to town” on my writing… and as uncomfortable as it is, I have grown exponentially from the experience.
The fact is, when you have people honestly and constructively critique your writing you will be saved the public humiliation of making basic mistakes on a large scale.
And that brings us back to poor Fergie!
Do you think she just got up on the stage in front of all those people and sang her amazing rendition on the fly, making it up as she went along?
Nope! The footage of her rehearsal was just as bad. (The things I do for you to write these emails is ridiculous! My eyes and ears will never be the same!)
I can only wonder why no one told her, her rendition was bad?
Perhaps they did, and she thought she knew better… and that’s a whole different topic for another day!
There’s no need to “Do a Fergie” when there is so much help available to you.
If you need help with your writing, I can critique it for you. And if you want me to critique and tweak it for you… I offer “Critweaks.” Just email me and let me know what you need… and I’ll tell you what I need. Then we can give your reader what they need!
Until next week… take care and let your words do the work : )
Pauline xxx
Pauline Longdon
a.k.a. The Copy Alchemist
P.S. I feel sorry for Fergie. I know how it feels to think you’ve done a good job, only to be told you suck. When I first started to write copy, I asked some of the gurus if there were words you don’t use. They just told me that if I wrote the way I spoke… I’d be fine.
Well, that was the worst advice ever, because the first professional job I submitted was torn apart by the head copywriter. Apparently, there’s lots of words you don’t use, and I had used most of them! Unfortunately, I learned the lesson the hard way. Luckily… you don’t have to. Let me help you.
P.P.P.S. I’ll be in San Diego next week. I’m going to the Traffic and Conversion Summit. There’s going to be around 6,000 people there. And mixed in the crowd are some of the sharpest minds in marketing and copywriting. I’ll be taking tons of notes and I’ll share some knowledge nuggets with you over the coming months. Stay tuned : )